Monday, May 16, 2011

Tears

I know that when morning comes, it will be a new day and my outlook will be much more positive, but I'm having a very hard time tonight not breaking down into tears and throwing myself onto the floor in an Emma-like breakdown.
Bedtime has always been my very favorite time of the day. I (or RJ) gets to rock and snuggle our little girl as she drinks her milk and goes to sleep. We put her in her crib and 90% of the time she is asleep until at least 5 am; giving us a few hours of time together hanging out and keeping our relationship strong. The last week or so has been rough and the last 2 nights have been dreadful. She hasn't slept more than a couple hours at a time and getting her back to sleep can take 45 minutes or more. Last night I ended up sleeping on the floor with her from 1-5, because there was no other way she would sleep. She is not sick, and I am fairly confident that this is a stage/bad habit/etc. as she is old enough to work us with her tears.
As a parent I feel helpless because there doesn't seem to be any easy solution. Many methods have been tried and tested. I'm convinced we have a little girl who loves attention and never wants to miss out on anything therefore she is super fun during the day but nightime=NIGHTmare.
Tonight I am using all of my strength to hold myself onto the couch and not get up as I see if she will cry herself to sleep. Nothing else is helping. I am out of options, patience, and willpower. I have sung, hummed, and back-rubbed myself out. I will try my best to post an update to see how this goes. As of now she has been standing in her crib crying for 20 minutes.......I need some prayers, encouragement, and maybe even a little luck to survive this.
Come on Emma! You amaze me everyday and I know we will make it through this! I love you baby girl♥

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